I care for you rap...hope you read this someday

Dear rap,

I'm so upset. I couldn't stop thinking. How can someone say this to me. "You don't care for him". Really rap? Amma don't care for you? I love you too much rap. I wish to tell...

Since the day you were born, I have never left you. Not a single day. I had been away for short durations for classes while you are with me at the university. I have never left you. I will not leave you. It's you who may have to leave the nest to soar the skies and reach for your dreams.

I left my salaried job to care for you. I couldn't bring myself to leave you in the care of another person. I wanted to be with you so I can do my best for you. Money cannot buy you rap. Money cannot buy the time I am with you. I care for you rap.

I put effort to cook a variety of food for you, I try to eat more vegetables so you would too. I stopped drinking carbonated drinks since I was pregnant with you. I hardly drink it now. 

I read frequently to gain knowledge about parenting a child. I make mistakes. I try to correct myself to be better because I care for you. I am human too but I really try.

I feel lonely sometimes but I have you. My days are hardly quiet and slow. I am ready to play with you and care for your basic needs anytime even though I am unwell. 

I still breastfeed you to give you the best. It's the best gift I can give you. I have been wounded multiple times in this breastfeeding journey. I was in much pain. I never gave up so I can give you the best. I care for you rap.

I don't even remember when was the last I slept and woke up at my own leisure time. It does not matter rap. You matter most to me. I wake up to check on you at night. Just so you are not covering your face with the blanket or the pillow or not falling off the bed's edge. I care for you rap. 

It's too many to list. It's just the little things I can do for you as your amma. Is it fair for anyone to say I don't care for you rap? You are too young to understand now rap. Maybe when you have the opportunity to become a parent yourself, it may be clear that I care for you.

We do so much together. I treasure all of it and regret my imperfection. I love you with all of me. I care for you rap.

With love,

your amma.